Real Talk

Finished my first day of real work in months. I am tired and groggy, being in the house with family just amplifies my bad mood for reasons I don't want to get into. I actually didn't prepare to going out into the field today, but overall it went pretty well. I've always been a better worker than a student, which is why I think I would make a better surgeon than a physician, but I digress.

Reality did hit me hard as I had to overcome my fears of approaching strangers and engaging in a conversation with them, convincing them of doing something that would benefit me financially, well them too, but mainly me. I had to pull out all my conversational techniques: baiting, asking questions, pretending to be interested in their problems, and controlling the conversation. These aspects were always hard for me as I've always had a more laid back approach to life, friends, and career. This does help me tremendously though, especially for future interviews. I actually didn't do too bad today, maybe it was beginner's luck, but after fucking up a bunch of conversations, I got the hang of things, at the end of the day I made enough to earn my keep.

For a start up branch of a national company, there are a few competitive people I am working with, some had their own businesses, some are conversational gurus, some are so smart that they just tested out of high school within 4 months. As an MCDB/Neuroscience major, I have no business skills whatsoever, I don't even know why they hired me to be honest, but I got my foot in the door, might as well take advantage of the situation. knowing that I might be leaving eventually for medical school is not going to stop me from doing my best, it doesn't matter who my competition is, I am striving for the top as fast as I can, I've set my goals, - become supervisor within 2 weeks, assistant manager within 4 months, and manager by the time I get to medical school. If all my goals are realized, then I would be one of the few people idiotic enough to leave a job that pays 6 figures to destroy my brain and spirit for the next 4 years.

The best part is, I would do it all without regret. To prove to myself that I can do it, and to prove to my parents that what they think is a good life isn't always what's right. They have done their part to raise me, but this is America, I make my own life.